This week my father-in-law, the picture of health, had quadruple bypass heart surgery. It was shocking, frightening, and moving. Shocking and frightening for all the reasons you can imagine. Moving because his family from near and far gathered quickly to care for him and do whatever they could to ease the situation.
In times of crisis, being thoughtful, mindful, and calm are so helpful. Asking, “How can I help? Is there anything you need?” is so much better than imposing a “solution” or “fix” for complex crises. Being quiet, listening, and holding a hand can make an incredible difference.
Your Style Statement is valuable in times of stress. My husband’s Style Statement is Comfortable Purity; mine is Refined Treasure. I watched my husband focus on getting the right information and hunt for healthy vegetarian food for his father. I emailed photos of our baby for grandpa to treasure before his surgery and in recovery, he savored time with his grandson.
In times of stress, allow your Style Statement to support you and your loved ones.
Ask yourself, “How can my authentic loving self be expressed in service?”
For example:
Design: Do your loved ones have a beautiful space in which to recover?
Cultivated: Are you helping to keep family members updated with helpful information?
Tailored: Can you organize follow-up medical appointments?
Creative: Maybe writing a poem is exactly what everyone needs right now.
Traditional: You can provide so much comfort providing assurance that someone trusted is taking care of home and beloved pets.
Style runs deep. It is about who you are in the best of times, and the toughest of times.
Photo credit: Chapter 24 by Mark Coggins
This is wonderful, and until I read this I had not thought of using my Style Statement in this way. And yet, though I hadn’t deliberately enacted my Genuine Heritage when my mom was in the hospital for a week (and one night my dad was there too — the stress of the week catching up with his heart), I absolutely employed it.
Genuine was letting them know I cared, in words and actions. Showing up. Bringing things from home that would be of comfort. Thanking the staff for their care and knowledge. Heritage was presenting artwork from their grandson that they could display. Calling my mom’s sisters and dad’s brother. Sitting with my mom and dad and talking about family, history, future.
How cool, Emily-Sarah, that you were using your Style Statement subconsciously. That’s probably the ultimate in embracing it … when you don’t even have to think about it and still have it guide you.